You may have noticed that this and the last posts’ drawings are particularly sexual and wiener-oriented (I checked the spelling Cait, it is “ie,” not an exception to the rule – I <3 U), blame Alfred Kubin. A few weeks ago Caitlin and Danielle and I went to the Neue Gallerie and looked at a show of his drawings and watercolors. It had sort of hokey mood elements, like creepy silhouettes behind windows and a room with period artifacts and brooding German music, but this stuff actually did its part in adding to the atmosphere, especially because it was relegated mainly to the hall and away from most of the artwork. I had no idea the man existed until Danielle said we should go see the show. Exquisitely disturbed, monstrous stuff. Sex and death and terrible beasts and bleak landscapes.

And speaking of terrible beasts, you can bet this wang would have been longer if I had known from the beginning that this was a horse man.

The winter time is a sleeping time. Also a time for losing checks! What the funk!

This post has a new drawing. They’ve all been a little bit old so far. Like, from the fall more than from the now. This one’s a little bit new. O-A looked weird to me. But it was right all along! See why we need to start over with speleeq?

I’m sick of spelling. I’m sure everybody else in the world is too. Why not make phonics actually work, especially if that’s how we’re going to teach people to read and to write? Wouldn’t it make sense to condense our language a bit? (Wudn’t it maak sens too kondens aur laqwij a bit?)

Nobody needs Q as it is. But, Q looks similar to G, so it can be NG.
X is also useless, but since it’s like a crooked T, it can stand in for TH.
No need for Z either, so turn that backwards S into SH!
C can be replaced by K or S where it makes those sounds, but we need it for CH, so it will do that on its own.
G will always be hard G, J will always be soft J.

Now, I admit the vowels are much harder. This is probably the most imperfect part of my New Spelling, and I admit it could use some work. But I’m trying to avoid accents and letter combinations, and to use only the letters we already have. Then again, the vowels as they stand are pretty freakin’ imperfect.

A alone is hard like cat
AA is long like ate
E is like ebb
EE is like pee
I is like imp
II is like eye
O is like pot (and like walk)
OO is like oar
U is like up (and like what, and at least for now, also like bird)
UU is like poo
Y is a consonant!

Ookaa, yuu kan luk foor moor uv xis in xu fyuucur. Heer’s a kupl droweeqs, boox storted wix xu litl droweeqs of karakturs II’m wurkeeq on and xen II druu giis on xu traan: